Bow Wow Wow Yippy Yo Yippy Tay

This post was first written in a drunken stupor.

Then Greta got a bit freaked because she thought it might disturb Fragile.

Apparently, Fragile has a dirtier mind than Greta does and went with the first idea.

(Yeah, you wish I had a dirtier mind than you…whatever…*wink*)

Idea #2

Greta: Here’s my first line for idea #2 – “Did I hear right?  Did I?  Did I?  Is it true that a little boy just had his birthday?”
Fragile: You’ve got to be kidding?! If you think we’re posting Idea #2, you’re insane!!!  😉

Greta! hahaha!! Ok then 😉 I think the girlies are in for some “Not to be viewed by virgin Kiddy Hanny Montanny eyes”  then 😉 muhahahhahas!

And so with our tongues out and chests thrusted… we begin our post with the original idea

Idea #1

Lawrd have mercy and spank me hard cuz Mamma’s little TayTay is no longer a Happy Meal.  Oh Behave!!  The precious Big Mac Attack is now fair game and finally -FINALLY!- I won’t have Child Welfare workers following my every step…. I’ve graduated to the men in blue.

-Even Better!  *wink wink*

Oh dear child how long have I waited?  It seems like only yesterday that I was counting down the days until I no longer looked like the older woman who was chasing after the lickable under-aged boy.  Now I look like the smokin’ hawt woman after the legalized delicious beefcake!
-Wait… that was just yesterday…
It’s amazing how you’ve improved  with age.  Why I remember back when you looked like this:

*shudder* This pic is just scary…we’re going to have to start labelling these pics Zygote TayTay now.
And now look at ‘cha!!  All glistening…. and shimmering…. and wet…. and ripped…. and…..
Ok Fragile — I think I should probably let you take over for a bit… I’ll be right back….
*screams* – “Hubz! Go to the bedroom, now!!”
*shaking head* Unlike Greta, who has been salivating for TayTay since…oh, he took his shirt off in New Moon (don’t even bother to deny it, girl. I was there. You screamed and tried to attack the screen!  HAHA!! I wasn’t the only one lmao!! There was a front row full of 9 year olds that squeed right with me lolz!  It nearly brought a tear to my eye listening to those future boy chasers squeal in delight. I hope I didn’t embarrass you when I stood up and started spanking-humping the air and ‘woohooing’ haha! I’ll try to behave next time.), I’ve been patiently biding my time. No Chris Hanson visits for me. I didn’t even open the offending Rolling Stone issue.

Eeeevil Rolling Stone, making all us weak old women look at jailbait *shaking finger*

Okay, so I did…shoot me.
And I will even admit, here in public, that, for one millisecond, when TayTay was all up on KStew in NM, I didn’t want them to answer the phone.

Come on, Bella! Edward leaving your ass in the woods = free pass to make out with the yummy Quileute

But that’s all over now!! TayTay is legal in all 50 states *woohoo* Don’t have to feel creepy anymore. This is even better than when Prince William turned 18 (don’t judge).

Jesus Christ on a cracker, Greta, where do you find these pics?!

HAHA!! I can not reveal my secrets (photobucket) but you like?  TayTay is all like “Hey Robbie, Fragile digs you Hobbits”.  LMAO!!

Still, I think I’m going to have to stop doing the % of age math. You know the math I’m talking about:
1 fragilelittlehuman (divided by) 1 Rob < 2 *happy dance*

I'm so happy Fragile's happy, I can barely contain myself!

But, no, TayTay has to mess up my formula:

1 fragilelittlehuman (divided by) 1 TayTay = 1 drunk, depressed fragilelittlehuman

At least it’s not 1 drunk, depressed, imprisoned fragilelittlehuman anymore 😉

And I am too damn pretty to go to jail...

Here Greta, you take it…I can’t continue to type if I want to drink two-fisted…

Uhhh…. did you just do math?

(*whispers…. I’m so sorry TayTay! She just can’t help it.  I think she goes for the brainz and not the brawn but haha… that cools…. We still lovers her.)

Back to what I was talking about 😉

Now, my little Indian Boy…*cough cough*… I mean my Big Strong Indian Man… what is it that you’d like me to get you for your birthday?

*whispers* She totally means Native American when she says Indian…

Hmmmm… no… I totally mean Indian BOY!! squee diddily DEE!!!!  Hot sexy sassy firm INDIAN boy!!  This little Ferret Girl (and by that I mean this little girl who’s had way too much caffeine) is putting on her red cape right now. And if TayTay wants to be my little INDIAN boy and just so happens to suggest (and by that I mean that just I assume) for me to come over to play Little Red Riding Hood with him then I see no reason why I shouldn’t honor his wish.  It IS his birthday after all and I don’t want to let the boy — I mean MAN– down.

*drops bra strap, wiggles ass, and winks*

*hiccup* Woohoo! Here’s a dollar *waving cash* Maybe we can get TayTay to do a Chippendale’s routine while we’re at it.  Yep, totally had too much to drink…

I can probably arrange that muhahahhas!!

*scampers off*

Happy Birthday TayTay!! I hope all your wishes come true cuz ours sure did!! We made a man outta you and Good Golly Miss Molly are we a couple of happy girls!

~ by erikasbuddy on 11 February 2010.

One Response to “Bow Wow Wow Yippy Yo Yippy Tay”

  1. OMG, you two are seriously distrurbed. I LOVES YOU.

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