You know fanfic has turned you into a shameless hussy* when…
Greta and I have been discussing lately how reading all this fan fiction is turning us into shameless hussies*. In case you were wondering if you, too, were becoming a shameless hussy*, here’s some of the signs:
– You start yanking your husband’s hair in hopes that it will turn him on but then you get yelled at because for some reason he’s bitching about you hurting him.
– Your husband asks why having your hair pulled suddenly turns you on.
– You begin to seriously consider piercing, tatting, or waxing…or all of the above.
– You throw out your husband’s plain old soap and replace it with the leather-scented kind just so you can imagine he’s Wideawakeward…and when the lights are out you can TOTALLY imagine it!
– You wish you’d gotten your husband that Maxim subscription he wanted so you can see Ashley’s new pics.
– You find yourself picking shirts that show off the girls and you’re seriously considering submitting your pic to Rack of the Week.
– You ask your husband if he can hang up a hook in the bedroom and would he mind if you hung from it.
– You can’t stop giggling at your husband’s Scooby-Doo pj bottoms and for some reason that fact that he wears them turns you on even more than it used to.
– You are fixated on fingers and what those fingers could do.
– Your husband says you’ve tired him out.
Oh, and I’m so not telling you which one of us of is doing which 😉
*and we mean shameless hussy in the most complimentary way possible
Yup, I’m a total hussy. And I’m glad I’m not the only one who has thought about piercing and waxing, ha. I ran out of batteries. Nuff said.
Fire Crotch said this on 10 November 2009 at 9:54 pm |
Um…yes, check, check, check and CHECK!!!!!
uhyesplease said this on 10 November 2009 at 9:55 pm |
yes to almost all of the above. And not only did I think about entering the Rack of the Week contest– I did it!
bierbeck said this on 10 November 2009 at 9:58 pm |
Apparently, I was a hushy before fanfic! Good to know. *winks* Oh and there are a few things missing from your list like… *walks away whistling*
cutie said this on 10 November 2009 at 11:12 pm |
HAHAHAHA!! I can’t stop laughing my ass off!!! LMAO!!! BRilliant!! I guess I shouldn’t give away which parts of this is me because then we can guess which parts are our innocent delicate little Fragile 😉 But OH BEHAVE!!
GRETA said this on 11 November 2009 at 9:20 am |
This is hysterical! Apparently, I was a raging hussy long before I read any fanfic as quite a bit of the above apply…
Bitches said this on 12 November 2009 at 10:23 am |
Guilty to all of the above *blushes* What a great post! How did I miss this before now? And hawt damn, I would soooo consider switching teams for some Ashley Greene!! *fans self*
Smuttier Than You said this on 12 November 2009 at 12:08 pm |
Uhm… guilty to all of the above too *waves at smutty*, and not even blushing. Especially the finger fixation. Are you ladies jealous if I tell you that, once DH noticed that (yes he’s paying that much attention), he started to develope totes new skills? With his hands? *swoon* Do I even have to remind you, HD is a musician (hands! skills!)?
Sorry – could not resist… awsome post. Ans so true!
Betti Gefecht said this on 12 November 2009 at 1:32 pm |